oh well.

its weird how i have so many things to say but just cant seem to find the right words.

i have so many mixed emotions and seriously im so confused at the point where i just wanna give up.

there's so many "i have to" "i should do" but where's the "i want to" or "i will do" sighs..

year of 2007. so many things happened both sad and happy memories. but i guess the main thing was that it was a year full of endings and new beginnings. i gladly accept change but im still having a dumbass hard time letting go. and no one can help me except myself.

but.

i invest so much emotions to people and my relationship with them that i forgot to leave some for my relationship with myself. im not trying to sound selfish or anything but i just realized how much i forgot to love myself this whole year. and as a result, deep inside me, im in pain but tried to hide those feelings just so none of my friends would be worried about me. stupid right? i lost my sense of individuality for what? nothing.

i always believed in "the more you give the more you recieve." all i wanted was loyalty from my friends and true love from those people who are closest to me. but somehow i just never felt that i got anything back from them.

i have to fix myself, love myself and take care of myself for now. i dont know how but i'll try. i gotta let go of everything that brings me down and try to do things that will make me happy.

i miss my friends. my bestfriends. my family. my bee. ALREADY. but i just gotta be who i am and what i wanna be for now.

when i am who i am again. the person people love so much, always happy and smiling, when i am okay again and i dont take things too seriously, then ill be back i promise.

DISTANCE. my only answer.